My Aversion to Jello

My survival post mentions jello. Here’s the story behind it. Growing up I loved jello like any other kid, although never grape. (Tastes like medicine to me, YUCK!) Red, Blue and Green were the faves in our household. Until my bout of survival with an ex-husband that put me into the hospital for a week. Then jello was a thing of the past.

Blue– The first morning I was in the hospital I woke up in ICU and had breakfast sitting in front of me. It contained a snack pak of blue jello and something else. I one-handedly finagled the package open and in my drugged up haze managed to eat it. *giggle* So this is where it gets interesting. The effort it took to eat the jello made me pass out and the next thing I know my mom is shaking my shoulder saying: 
Mom- “Honey. Are you ok?” 
Me- “Uh huh.”
Mom- “Why are your lips blue?”
Me- “BLUE JELLO!” (As I proceed to stick out my tongue to show her.)
BWAHAHAHAHAHA We still laugh at my mom to this day because all my monitors were beeping that I was still alive and well. Needless to say she was pissed the nurses gave me blue jello because it almost gave her a coronary. No more blue.
Red– A few days later, after my second surgery that week, I woke up to red jello. We still like to think the remnants of anesthesia are to blame for this episode. I eat my jello, possibly toast and continue my conversation with my mom and Mike. Then I get the urge to pee so I get some help to the bathroom and am told by the nurse to fill the bucket in the toilet so they know my hydration level. (TMI I know but it pertains to the punch line in a bit.) I tell my mom and Mike (in a 3 year old whiny fashion) “I DO IT!” I was so fed up of being robbed my independence. I just want to sit on the potty in peace. So there I am trying to pee, hooked up to an IV stand and all, when I get this overwhelming sensation to upchuck. Well, shit. there’s not a trash can near me, I’m hooked up to this stupid IV stand, I’ve got to throw up. I get up to turn around so I can puke into the toilet. Well that part gets fuzzy because I’m not quiet sure what happened then. All I know is this is how the conversation proceeded:
Me- “Uhhhhhh. Help. Mom?”
Mom- “Honey? Are you ok in there?”
Me- “No. We need a clean up crew in here.” (Sounds like I fell into the toilet, right?)
Mike peeks around the corner as my mom opens the door to the bathroom.
Mike- “Well did you at least fill the cup?”
Me- “Nope. I missed.” 
Asshole. I don’t think vomit counts. He still refers to this as my exorcism moment. All Linda Blair style. haha Whatever. I tell you what though. It was EVERYWHERE. All over the toilet, floor, the walls surrounding the toilet. Not. A. Clue how it got in those places. Red is out.
So that’s why I have an aversion to red and blue jello. Green is still good and orange too! Ohhh good memories. 
Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s